11 – Periphery (or sandwiched in between here and what comes next)

I’m livin’ on the edge these days
distant cousin twice removed
from almost everything

Twilight zone or
outer limits

or this someplace
where everything in between
— the meat and cheese of the day —
are too much to bear

lettuce pray

I feel crazy, almost,
just enough to be scary
or raise concern
but only if I start talking

and there’s no one to talk to
thankfully, maybe
on the edge of night and day
except the cat

which makes it even madder

I’m considering a nocturnal existence
here on the dark side of the clock
leave the decision making
and negotiating to the day walkers
who don’t burn hot when the sun rises

do the birds only wake to the dawn
or are their insides flaming like mine
wondering what comes next in
these unpredictable days

Pay no mind to that man behind the curtain
he only thinks he controls his days

every day is unpredictable, darling
you’ve just had the blinds ripped off
the rug pulled out from under
your wings clipped

This too shall pass
she thinks with a wicked laugh
and what comes next will, too
so round and round we go
until we, dizzy, die

I feel thin, Bilbo said,
stretched like butter
over too much bread.

I need a holiday.

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Poem ©2024, Jen Payne. Photo by Antoni Shkraba. If you like this poem, you can read similar in my books and zines, available from Three Chairs Publishing on my ETSY SHOP. They come autographed, with gratitude and a small gift.