How I’ll Glow Up

As I grow older,
I want to make myself
a better person

I want to put down my ego —
my self ego
and my human ego —
and see the world
with wide wonder
and compassion

I want to stop taking sides,
stop needing a defense
or a logo or a standard,
let go of my attachments,
my fear, my uncertainty,
wear my age loosely

I want to open my heart,
let love in
in big, scary ways
so I am full up

so instead of dying
maybe I just burst
like the jewelweed flowers
that explode with seeds
along the trail

seeds of love
and curiosity
seeds of magic
and dreams

seeds left to flower
in the oneness
when I am gone

This is a response poem because yes, some products are made in China, but so are Pandas and Snow Leopards, so grow up. Photo by Terry W. Johnson, Georgia Wildlife Resources Division. Poem @2023, Jen Payne. If you like this poem, you can read similar in my books and zines, available from Three Chairs Publishing on my ETSY SHOP. They come autographed, with gratitude and a small gif

The Shy Ones’ Hour

I sit on a Noble bench in the woods
it’s barely 7 — the shy ones’ hour
we come early to this place
the humming bird at the apple bough
the rabbit among her clover
the timid turtle poking its head from the pond
to see who and what is about
so I respond with a whisper
We’re safe to float in Eden a little longer
as two herons fly overhead
and it’s so quiet we hear wings beat,
heartbeats even
this morning before the fray.

Photo: a bench along a trail in Branford dedicated to naturalist and birder Noble S. Proctor, Ph.D., who amassed a lifelong birding list of over 6,000 species worldwide and wrote numerous books on birds and wildlife. It carved wth Proctor’s quote: Always something to see. Poem ©2023, Jen Payne. If you like this poem, you can read similar in my books and zines, available from Three Chairs Publishing on my ETSY SHOP. They come autographed, with gratitude and a small gift.

Mea Culpa

I apologize to the birds

for being late

for arriving to the feeder

after the snow begins

assure them not to worry

there’s an endless supply

I say out loud

while I note “birdseed”

on a pad by the door……..again.

Poem ©2021, Jen Payne. Photo by Chiot’s Run.

Sanderlings

Perhaps it is the same flock,
the one I met years ago,
the one that startled me
here on this shore
that very first walk,
when every rock and curve,
every wind and wave
was unfamiliar still.

Perhaps it knows me now,
this flock of small fidgety birds,
always nervous or impatient,
quickened by anticipation of
the next wave, skittering
to the beat of their sharp trills,
quickly quickly ahead
never near enough for hello again.

Until this morning when I,
in keen focus on a resting shell,
became for a moment
likewise and warmed by the sun,
looked up to find myself surrounded,
heart quickened and nervous
that one false move would startle them,
their gathering at my feet.

Poem and Photo ©2020, Jen Payne. If you like this poem, then you’ll love WAITING OUT THE STORM, a collection of my poems about Cape Cod. Click here to buy the book now.

29 – Getting Out

I’m in the woods.
Grandgirl says
as she steps her
wee self off the trail
and into the leaves
then gallops
ahead to chase
the butterfly
see the meadow
I’m in the woods!

he says, too,
as Nephew leaps
from the inside
breathes the outside
and careens
down a path
in front of us
climbing rocks
light saber at the ready
running
running
running

I’m in the woods!

Poem ©2020, Jen Payne. For Max and Lia. National #NaPoWriMo. National Poetry Writing Month. If you like this poem, you can read similar in my books, available from Three Chairs Publishing on my ETSY SHOP. They come autographed, with gratitude and a small gift.