This postcard, called “Running with Chickens” was today’s post on the Daily Postcard blog. It made me giggle. And then I thought: Don’t step on the chickens!
“The line between normal and crazy seemed impossibly thin. A person would have to be an expert tightrope walker in order not to fall.”
– Augusten Burroughs, Running with Scissors
Did you ever see the Cheers episode when Frasier is arguing with Rebecca (Christie Allie)? He grabs a pair of scissors and runs around the bar, defiantly calling out: I’M RUNNING WITH SCISSORS! I’M RUNNING WITH SCISSORS!
For Christmas this year, I got an iPod Nano. It’s sparkly green, the size of a postage stamp, and holds 80 gazillion songs. I just love it! Especially at the gym. I even have a special gym playlist that takes me walking briskly along two miles of scenic treadmill:
P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing), Michael Jackson
Ray of Light, Madonna
Raise Your Glass, Pink
I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho), Pitbull
We No Speak Americano, Yolanda Be Cool
Jump, Jive an’ Wail, The Brian Setzer Orchestra
Pump Up the Jam, Technotronic
Firework, Katy Perry
World, Hold On, Bob Sinclair
I like to Move it, Reel 2 Real
No, not my usual genre of music. But I have to tell you, half-way through the list, I’m about ready to break out into a run!
Except running scares me.
There’s this hilarious episode of Friends when Rachel and Phoebe go running, and Phoebe’s idea of running is racing down the sidewalk with her arms flailing and her legs askew.
Phoebe explains: “I run like I did when I was a kid because that’s the only way it’s fun. You know? I’m mean, didn’t you even run so fast you thought your legs were gonna fall off, you know, like when you were running towards the swings or running away from Satan?”
That’s the kind of running I could get into—there on that treadmill at the gym.
Arms flailing. Legs askew. Singing out-loud with my headphones on. Running away from Satan.
Makes me think…
“God, I hope I don’t end up alone….Some pathetic old woman with nobody to go on a whale watch with.” (Augusten Burroughs, Running with Scissors)
• • •